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Friday, August 13, 2004

Deja Vu Part 1, Picking up a Girl

Ah... memories...

Years ago I met a stripper named Daniela. It was almost a footnote in this post about the bad experiences I had with strippers. To reinterate: she picked me up, we went out a couple of times and had fun, and then I broke up with her abruptly, and never heard a reply from her.

Back in June I chronicled the saga of Cameron, basically the first girl I ever picked up, who turned out to be a stripper. It ended with an invitation for her to visit me in NYC but we lost touch when I went to France because she has no email and I had no phone. Another loose end.

And just last week I wrote about my 36 hours in Hell where I met May, the most skilled sex provider I have ever met, and later met a cute and business-minded hostess Jenny, as well a few other hostesses. I had received all their cell phone numbers, but hadn't called any of them. (I clearly had a better time than this Brit) Another loose end.

Yesterday (note: probably two days ago by the time I post this) was quite an unbelievable day, since quite unexpectedly these loose ends flapped my way and tied themselves into a knot. Whether it's a slipknot, hangman's noose, or a Gordian knot is unclear. But it happened all on the same day, while in my Asian hotel, and all via phone.


Daniela had her son when she was 17 years old, pregnant at 16. The father ran off and she raised him as a single mom. She has a model quality face and was a local child model, but never could make a career out of it, so it was stripping. At the time we met and dated, she was looking for a serious committed relationship and a father for her son. I most certainly was not. So to be fair to her and her kid, on a beautiful morning at our beachfront hotel in Santa Monica... I broke it off. We had never had sex, which mystified her because she was very willing. But I broke it off quite early and abruptly rather than let it develop into something complex. She had much more to risk than I in a deep relationship. I hadn't seen or heard from her since then, and the lack of closure was a little unfortunate.

Yesterday she phones me out of the blue to catch up. It's the morning in Asia when she calls; the early evening for her. After a little chit chat about what we had been doing in the years we were apart, she suddenly apologizes for never responding to me back when I cut it off. She said she realized the following night that although I could have slept with her I didn't because I was thinking about her and her son, and that was the most amazing thing she could think of a man doing. And that wounded and disappointed her even more.

But then she makes the points of telling me that her son is now ten and very independent, her sister is now married and local, Daniela moved into the same neighborhood as her aunt and cousin who has kids of the same age, and paired with the flexible hours of stripping, consequently Daniela now has a tremendous amount of free time. Moreover she decided last year that she didn't believe in marriage or long-term commitment, that her son wouldn't have any value out of a dad at this late stage, and that she enjoyed her single status. She said she had been dating and having a blast. She had "hardly any" sex the previous ten years, and she said she was quite enjoying catching up with what she had missed.

So she asked me to look her up the next time I was in town, and we could hang out together. Her interest was obvious, but I was noncomittal. Detecting this, she withdrew somewhat. But today she sent an email saying that she was too forward, and she understood my hesitation, but left an open invitation to call. A nice quote from her email:

It was very liberating to realize that nothing in life is truly forever and enjoying moments for what they are is much more the way to go- for me at least....
More interestingly, I had asked her for the reason she had decided to call me when she did: it was because she was talking with some other strippers at work, and they were describing bad boyfriends and good boyfriends, and the talk reminded her of me. (I'm hoping it was the good men category...) So right after work she called.

Now don't get me wrong: I'm not writing about this incident because I'm thinking of going back to her. I'm not. But the plot will thicken...

DEJA VU TWO I hang up with Daniela. I'm awake, so I decide to start the morning routine. While washing my face, the phone rings. I go pick it up, still rubbing my towel on my face.

It's Cameron.

She is bubbly and very upbeat. She tells me that she's missed me and if it was ok, she'd like to take me up on visiting New York this weekend. (She's never been there.) I tell her I'm in Asia. She professes disappointment, but then perks up and asks when I'm in the US.

A little backstory on Cameron: when we last met she disclosed that she had an ex-boyfriend that she dumped but was having a little difficulty letting go. He's older than I am. She described him as a jerk that never did anything for her, despite the outrageous number of hints she dropped, and despite the nice things she would do for him. Like he never bought her anything pretty, she had buy it herself; they never travelled, she had to go alone; she would give him a massage, he wouldn't reciprocate, and never would let her go to a spa. Well, it's easy to be partisan when you hear only one side of the story. One of the first things I said, "Heck if you were my girlfriend, I would send you to a spa."

Now I'm not serious about Cameron. I think the main attraction I have to her, besides the physical (she is one of the few body types I like that has large breasts,) is that she is a country girl and hasn't seen much of the world. It's not like she's very young and innocent, being in her late 20's and with a college degree, but she inexperienced in some ways that I am very experienced. And there is some attraction to being unquestionably dominant as a male.

Back to the phone call: I tell her that I won't be in NYC for a while. She does a convincing pout over the phone. She talks about how she's moved into an apartment to get away from her ex-boyfriend, she's going to a different strip club that's better but a longer commute, and she's looking for a house so she can rollover her other place for favorable tax treatment. And so on. I start to wonder about her international calling plan.

Cameron says although she hasn't really kept in touch, she's missed me and would really like to meet.

I tell her that somebody else I hadn't seen for a while just called me, and what a coincidence it was that Cameron was calling also. Cameron asks if she is better looking than the other woman (she is). Hey, I did say she was straightforward in my previous post.

Cameron then divulges that she called this evening (her time) because she was talking to some girlfriends about her loser ex-boyfriend stalking her, and then how nice I was in comparison, and how difficult it seemed to find decent men that were her type.

Hold on, back up, I say. What talk with what girlfriends?

She bubbles on, oh, this girl, that girl, one girl who claimed that she had a boyfriend a while ago who was a gentleman like you, and he took her for a ride on his jet. But she might have been lying.

Whoa. Yep, you guessed it. Daniela and Cameron were in the same conversation. Both of them had moved clubs and now worked in the same place! But they don't really know each other, and certainly don't know that they know the same person.

What are the odds?

I told Cameron that we probably moved too fast, and that instead of a visit to NYC could I send her to the local spa? My idea was to purchase a gift certificate or something. She didn't seem too keen on that, but said that would be ok as long as I promised I'd see her the next time I came to town (yes, that's a weird logic.) I make some vague statements and hang up.


I finish up at the hotel, and go out to do my business activities. In the late afternoon as the weather starts to get really bad, I get back to the air conditioned splendor of my room.

The phone rings...

Continued in part II


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